The Tragedy of A Late Diagnosis

I was relieved and angry. Relieved because everything makes sense now, and angry because why not earlier? I was diagnosed when I was 33. Can you imagine how different my life would've been if I was diagnosed earlier?

It was like a weight off my shoulders, but I'm also super depressed because of what I could've been. I have a lot of trauma from childhood because of my undiagnosed ADHD.

I've recently been diagnosed and I've been in a funk since.

I was lucky and was diagnosed in the 2nd grade, back in the 80s, but nobody expressed to me or my family how it would effect my emotions and mental state. They just focused on my lack of focus.  The doctor told my parents meds were a crutch and I'd be better off learning to adjust on my own.

Even when I would see a therapist about my depression and lack of self esteem, I would tell them about my diagnosis early on. They never told me it could be related. I'm now almost 40 and just starting to feel comfortable trying a medicated approach. I've tried depression meds, anxiety meds, etc., but not one for my ADHD until my current doctor thought "hey, maybe you should try some meds specifically designed to help ADHD symptoms."   So many years lost and wasted. .

I spent years thinking I was lazy and hating myself. I'm still grieving because I lived with guilt, shame, depression my whole life